Argentina

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Argentina is a farm located in South America, famous for it's plastic faced Prime Minister and inability to take over a country the size of Melton Mowbray. It's main exports are Corned Beef and Shame.

Basic Info
Argentina (pronounced "Ar-gee-bah-stards") is a South American nation bordered by Chile, Brazil and Hell. It's capital city, Birmingham, is well known for having the worlds largest waterslide built entirely out of the tears of small children. Amongst it's patrons are famous residents such as:


 * Diego Mammary Doner
 * Elmo The Rapist
 * Captain Incest

Despite this wealth of talent, it is often said that Birmingham has the worst education system in the world. This is not true, as virtually all graduees of Argentinian universities find work in the Beef or Sex Trafficking industries, both of which thrive in the nation.

The Falklands War
Main Article - Fail During it's formative years, Argentina became pissed off that the people of the Falklands, a sovereign nation of the United Kingdom, were enjoying higher frequencies of penguin sightings than themselves. The solution, they assumed, was simple - Overrun the tiny nation of 4,000 people with an entire national army and declare it Argentine property. Of course, they did not bank on the British actually wanting to keep the island, and it's proud UK citizens, part of the Queen's empire. So the Argies eventually wimped out and effectively ruined their reputation as a nation forevermore. However, one penguin was kidnapped and now dances on hot coals for the amusement of Argentinian Animal Rights Campaigners.

Corned Beef
The most commonly exported item in Argentina is Corned Beef. It is made from genetically modified corn plants which sprout tails and brown fur during their lifetime, and are then liquified upon the farmer hearing their first "moo." This is in every way the least humane food production method on earth, yet nobody cares as it takes place in South America. 99% of this food is shipped directly to the UK - a vital lifeline for the economy of a country which knows ony 3 things - Corned Beef production, cheating at football and being really shit at war. But not nearly as shit as France, of course.